The Art of Mindful Apology!
Apologies require taking full responsibility.
There is no sense in saying sorry if you continue to commit your mistakes. An apology is the superglue of life! It can repair just about anything, provided, you make the change required, i.e., only if you genuinely correct your mistake along with saying sorry. The difficulty, is not in avoiding death, but in avoiding unrighteousness; for that runs faster than death. Make amendments instead of saying sorry; let your sorry be felt in actions more than in words.
We all have soft-corners for the one's we love and when our loved one's do us wrong, we forgive them even when they are not sorry, and this way we give them permission somewhere to keep doing wrong with us, so stop and reflect... Will this ultimately lead us towards a good or bad consequence? Think and Act. Truth may hurt for a moment but lying and cheating will hurt you for life. Some people don't genuinely apologize. Deceit has become their lifestyle. They are centered on themselves with no thoughts of the consequences of their acts. In cowardly style, they tell more lies to try and cover their tracks. They hide and escape from the truth. This results in derogatory outcomes for all involved. Don’t promote unhealthy behaviors. It will never result in anything good or positive for anyone.
Proper communication avoids misunderstandings, and the resultant conflicts. "Sorry" is indeed, one of the most difficult and most powerful words, provided one can feel and say it at the same time. It's difficult because you sincerely need to feel the pain of the other person and rise above your ego to say it; it is powerful because you overwhelm the other with the opposite reaction of what they were expecting. No half-truths, no partial admissions, belong in any apology. Take responsibility when you do wrong, that will not only earn you more respect but will also build the lost trust.
The 3 steps of mindful apology-
1) Acknowledge your mistakes,
2) Say sorry and correct your mistakes,
3) Be mindful of never repeating it again.
Also, whether you receive forgiveness or not is not in your control, but don’t be resentful if your apology is not accepted or you have not been forgiven. People need space and time in some cases beyond what you can appropriate necessary. We can never really estimate the damage we do to others whether intentionally or unintentionally by our acts or words because not everything is visible. But the least we can do is put our best foot forward in the given set of circumstances. Repentance is not as easy as it sounds because your ego will come in the way. When you are strong enough to silence the voice of your ego and courageously move that’s when you can make wise choices.
The Relationship Matrix!
Relationships should be treasured and not played with. When you respect the individual, you respect your relationship with them. Its easy to break trust or be reckless in your dealings, that’s the easy escape route from being responsible. What takes real effort is to sustain a relationship. The relationship matrix is similar to that of planting a flower. Sowing the seeds is not enough, you need to nurture it by providing it an environment which nourishes it.
As humans its natural that we make mistakes but what’s important is that we have the nerve to correct our wrong doings. Never assume yourself to be perfect enough that you belittle others in the process. Value people not things. Taking people for granted reflects your ignorance. Be mindful in your dealings. Accept people for what they are and help them become better versions of themselves after coming in contact with you. Be a mark of positivity and healthy boundaries.
Sow seeds of greatness and then nurture it with care and diligence. Remember, everything beautiful starts with self-love and not selfishness. Set healthy boundaries for yourself and others. Make the equation a win-win scenario for all involved. Never accept less than what you deserve but nonetheless, never belittle others. What you sow is what you shall reap. Sow greatness and achieve greatness.
Realize before it’s too late.
Covid pandemic has taken away more lives than we can truly count. Not only the individuals who have died but they have left back families that appear to be living but are dead emotionally. We can never know or predict when is our last moment, so its important that we value our time and the individuals that come along our path. Be a good memory for others. Leave this world better than you found it. This is the greatest legacy to leave behind. Age is just a number, so don’t assume you are young so you have time to repair things in future. Consider it as NOW or NEVER. If you have hurt someone apologize and if someone hurt you forgive them. Let grace be your fashion statement for life. Let the world experience a beauty that’s truly difficult to comprehend. Be a game changer, uplift people and not downgrade them. Have courage and be kind. It’s a mark of greatness to be kind to unkind people. However, don’t waste your energy or time on the opinion of people who can’t discern your depth and see your value. Even the wisest of men were accused by shallow minded individuals. You don’t just have a revelation; you are a revelation! You teach what you know but impart who you are! Never surround yourself with small minded people assuming you can help them improve their attitude and mindset, never deceive yourself in order to safeguard or uplift others. Some people are seriously dangerous to your destiny! Just because it looks right on the outside does not mean its right on the inside!